Choose between love and hate

Good morning. This is a devotional for single adults from Parenting Solo, but the message also applies to single adults without children who may one day marry a single parent and be a step-parent. Feel Free to forward it to a friend.

Scripture: Matthew 10:21-22 (The Message) "When people realize it is the living God you are presenting and not some idol that makes them feel good, they are going to turn on you, even people in your own family. There is a great irony here: proclaiming so much love, experiencing so much hate! But don't quit. Don't cave in. It is all well worth it in the end. It is not success you are after in such times but survival."

A couple of days ago, I got hooked on a TV reality show called "Flipped out." (It's what teachers on summer vacation do!) The star of the show is Jeff, a wigged out 30-something big-time house-flipper in the Los Angeles area. After about two minutes, you know he has Obsessive Compulsion Disorder, which he later acknowledges on air. When he moves into a house he bought and remodeled, he calls in a friend to "bless" the house. She is a sooth-sayer or seer or whatever you want to call her. Later Jeff says such things as "God is mad at me for the things I've done" and "I wonder if this will get me into heaven?"

Not likely Jeff. Yes, God is angry with you for bringing in a median and not consulting him first. You're in big trouble. But then, you're the kind of guy who hires someone to "talk" to your pets. I laughed, but this is how much of society thinks and lives today. They have no concept of who the real, living God is, because they haven't read the Bible, and don't believe in what it says anyway. They make up their own religion, because God is a God or rules, and he might not like something in their lifestyle. We don't want to have anything that "feels good" to be taken away. We want to nix anything that is tough on us.

We're really good at making idols and worshiping them. Money, jobs, cars, houses, material goods, sex -- even, gasp, golf! And God forbid anyone should ever criticize us for our idols, because that means you're intolerant and if there's anything we can't tolerate, it's anyone who is intolerant. That pretty much means everyone is intolerant in some way, shape or form. Everybody's mad because no one wants to be held accountable for their actions.

In our hearts, we all know when we sin. God gave each of us a conscience. We just don't want to have to admit it, because then we might realize we should probably give it up for the sake of our emotional or physical health. Jesus reminds us of such times and tells us to stand firm for our beliefs. He warns us it will happen, so don't freak out when it does happen. We are called to be survivors in such times. He tells us to go about our business quietly, so as not to draw attention to ourselves. God wants people to see us because of our Godly virtue, not because of our holier-than-thou attitudes.

How does this apply to my life?

Today’s prayer: Lord, help me to stand firm in my beliefs, but help me to be humble each day. Lord, let my attitude turn people to you, not away from you. Amen.

Doug Mead

Parenting Solo

Copyright 2008. All rights reserved.

Vol. 3, No. 78

This week’s reading plan can be found at http:/www.oneyearbibleonline.com/june.asp?version=51

Get out of the way!

Good morning. This is a devotional for single adults from Parenting Solo, but the message also applies to single adults without children who may one day marry a single parent and be a step-parent. Feel Free to forward it to a friend.

Scripture: Matthew 10:17-20 (The Message) “Don’t be naïve. Some people will impugn your motives, others will smear your reputation – just because you believe in me. Don’t be upset when they haul you before the civil authorities. Without knowing it, they’ve done you – and me – a favor, given you a platform for preaching the kingdom news! And don’t worry about what you’ll say or how you’ll say it. The right words will be there; the Spirit of your Father will supply the words.”

Jesus gives his followers plenty of warnings about enemy attacks. In the previous graph, he tells the twelve disciples he is sending off, “Stay alert.” Here, he reminds them “Don’t be naïve.” Whenever Jesus reinforces a statement, it means he wants people to take extra precautions. It’s like a parent saying to a child, “I really, really mean it!” only this time, he really, really does mean it.

People who make the decision to serve God need street smarts, not just book smarts. When my son was growing up, I wanted him to get good grades, but not be naïve to how the world works. Too, Jesus didn’t want his followers to have hurt feelings for being ripped off at inopportune moments. The enemy knows your motives and will be there at every opportunity with distractions. Smearing your reputation is one of his tactics. Jesus says to forget about it, don’t bother.

He says that because we know God uses bad circumstances to bring about good in certain circumstances. Look at the life of Joseph. He is sold into slavery, accused of rape and left to rot in a prison, before his purpose came about. Because he remained faithful for some 17 years, he was able to save family from starvation. Had Joseph defended his reputation to Potiphar or in prison, he might never have become second in command to Pharoah over all of Egypt. Joseph didn’t let his surroundings keep him from trusting God.

That’s how God works sometimes. All these rotten things happen to us, then suddenly, we have a platform to preach his name. Cat got your tongue? Don’t worry about it. Ask God for the right words, and he will open your mouth just so. It isn’t your diction or your eloquent words that bring salvation, it’s God’s message. Sometimes, we just have to get out of the way and let him go. It’s a great feeling to realize you don’t know what to say or do, then say a quick, silent prayer, “I got nothing. You’re on, Lord.” Then you watch a miracle happen right before your eyes. Magical words come out of your mouth. The other person has ears to hear. Viola! Another saint for the kingdom. All because we just got out of the way and let God work.

How does this apply to my life?

Today’s prayer: Lord, help me to know when to just get out of the way and let you work. Help me to have wisdom to see when I need to do that, which is pretty much all the time. Amen

Doug Mead

Parenting Solo

Copyright 2008. All rights reserved.

Vol. 3, No. 77

This week’s reading plan can be found at http:/www.oneyearbibleonline.com/june.asp?version=51

How to be cunning and inoffensive

Good morning. This is a devotional for single adults from Parenting Solo, but the message also applies to single adults without children who may one day marry a single parent and be a step-parent. Feel Free to forward it to a friend.

Scripture: Matthew 10:16 (The Message) “Stay alert. This is hazardous work I’m assigning you. You’re going to be like sheep running through a wolf pack, so don’t call attention to yourselves. Be as cunning as a snake, inoffensive as a dove.”

The Bible often uses references such as sheep and wolves in analogies as to how the world works. Jesus pulls no punches in comparing sheep to wolves. In this case, Jesus is sending out his twelve disciples and comparing their work to sheep, while the wolves are unbelievers, or, more specifically, the Pharisees. The key phrase is to “stay alert” for what might be around us as we minister to others in your travels. If we aren’t careful, we will be devoured by hungry wolves.

Sheep are by nature dumb animals who think only about eating, drinking water, sleeping and reproducing. The Bible constantly references believers as potentially lost, who need a Shepherd to guide them. The NIV capitalizes Shepherd, meaning God, as the one we look to for guidance and for our protection. Jesus tells us specifically not to be sheep-like in how we act when we are out in the world. We are to be sensible and not gullible, yet not be conniving when we interact with others. When we lie or deceive others, we bring attention to ourselves instead of our mission. Our actions shine a bad light on Christianity and God.

We must find a balance in being “cunning” and “inoffensive” if we are to be successful in doing God’s work. We are always vulnerable to the enemy’s attacks if we aren’t careful. Another words, we should keep our heads up and be looking for the enemy’s attacks. We need to always realize that wolves aren’t friendly, and they are always hungry. They can attack at any time, even at night when we are sleeping.

Keeping God first in our lives is always the struggle. It doesn’t take much to get us off-kilter and be unable to serve others. As a single parent, our children are always open to such attacks. Because we must be the primary caregiver for our children, that often means stepping away from ministry to care for our own. In that regard, they are our primary flock and we are their shepherd. They depend on us. Our first responsibility is to our children. We can’t minister to others if our own lives are chaotic. When we manage our home life well, we are ready to be a shepherd of others. We have proven your ability to protect and lead at home, which is what God looks to first for his kingdom leaders.

How does this apply to my life?

Today’s prayer: Lord, help me to find that balance in my home life and ministry life. Help me to be someone that others look up to so that I can lead others to your Son. Amen

Doug Mead

Parenting Solo

Copyright 2008. All rights reserved.

Vol. 3, No. 76

This week’s reading plan can be found at http:/www.oneyearbibleonline.com/june.asp?version=51

Gentle conversation

Good morning. This is a devotional for single adults from Parenting Solo, but the message also applies to single adults without children who may one day marry a single parent and be a step-parent. Feel Free to forward it to a friend.

Scripture: Matthew 10:12-14 (The Message) “When you knock on a door, be courteous in your greeting. If they welcome you, be gentle in your conversation. If they don’t welcome you, quietly withdraw. Don’t make a scene. Shrug your shoulders and be on your way.”

In this life, there will be people who are friendly to you and those who will oppose you. Jesus wants to steer you clear of those people who are against you so that you don’t get frustrated or try to convert hearts that aren’t ready. He wants to make life easier for you. He even tells us to “shrug your shoulders” and leave. Another words, don’t worry about things you can’t control.

Jesus knows that there will be opposition to the message we carry about salvation. He knows some people will be open and others will be against it. He doesn’t want us wasting time preaching to people whose ears are closed. Instead, focus on the lost who are seeking and have open ears. Spend time with them, don’t be in a hurry and be there to meet their needs. God has been working on their hearts, and they are responding. So he puts them in your path to minister to them. Don’t be in a hurry to move on. Jesus is always about building relationships.

Jesus knows how frustrating it is to try and convert those whose hearts are closed, so he tells us to just move on. Those with closed hearts love to badger you and tell you everything that is wrong with Christianity. You see it today in society with the gay and lesbian faction, the pornography issue, abortion and every kind of addiction. People are just looking for excuses not to follow Jesus. Some people are so angry at their circumstances that they don’t have room in their hearts for the love of Jesus. It’s easier to blame someone else, so they blame Jesus and every one of his followers.

Don’t fight a fight that isn’t meant to be yours. Leave that fight to God. Ministering to people with broken hearts is difficult enough. It takes a strong believer to constantly overcome the struggles of that kind of ministry. He must be wise enough to stop and rest when tired, because healing ministry is draining. Someone who walks in to our churches is seeking. He just needs someone to reach out to him and share the love of God. Don’t be afraid; take a deep breath and take that first step toward him. Be gentle in your conversation. No attacking or impugning his motives. Just listen, then pray for him. Building a relationship takes time. Bringing salvation to the lost rarely happens on the first meeting. Take your time. Jesus is never in a hurry.

How does this apply to my life?

Today’s prayer: Lord, help me to see those you put in front of me. Help me to be gentle in conversation and caring. Help me to lead them to you. Amen

Doug Mead

Parenting Solo

Copyright 2008. All rights reserved.

Vol. 3, No. 75

This week’s reading plan can be found at http:/www.oneyearbibleonline.com/june.asp?version=51

Join God’s army today

Good morning. This is a devotional for single adults from Parenting Solo, but the message also applies to single adults without children who may one day marry a single parent and be a step-parent. Feel Free to forward it to a friend.

Scripture: Matthew 10:9-10 (The Message) “Don’t think you have to put on a fund-raising campaign before you start. You don’t need a lot of equipment. You are the equipment, and all you need to keep that going is three meals a day. Travel light.”

After my divorce 14 years ago, I was blessed to find a path that helped me heal and grow. I found both through a loving church that I found after separating from my wife. My new church helped me see the light about my life, as well as divorce recovery classes to help me understand what I was going through. A year later, knowing how valuable that healing was, I helped start a new program at my new church, called “Just Me and the Kids.” It was a 12-week divorce recovery program written by Barb Schiller for single parents and their children. My son went through that first class. (Ironically, he missed the week on denial, and that has always been his struggle.)

I have been doing ministry for single parents ever since, mostly at the church level. Now, much of what I do is help men come to terms with who they are and to grow as a man of God. I got that same kind of coaching from my first singles pastor at my church 14 years ago. The same principles apply today. He was my Paul and I his Timothy. Today, I am mostly the Paul with other men (though I am a Timothy in my 1-year-old marriage).

I had never done ministry before in church before I started caring for and teaching other single parents. I had grown up in the church and served others in various capacities, but rarely nothing beyond raising my hand to volunteer to set up or clean up after a program or dinner. Now, I am trying to use the gifts that God gave me to care for others. On Saturday, I watched a man, who I have watched grow in the Lord up close for the past three years, get married. I told him how proud God was of his growth. Someday, I hope he comes alongside another man and helps him grow up.

It doesn’t take a seminary degree to do ministry. Jesus helped shape the life of 12 ordinary men, then sent them off to start a religion that became a following of more than a million people in just the first year. All it takes to be a harvest hand is to be ready. Indeed, “you are the equipment.” You don’t need money or anything special to do God’s work. You simply need the Bible, which means you need knowledge of the Bible, which means you need to read and study the Bible every day. It is my mission to help single parents realize how valuable they are to the kingdom. People who have not gone through a divorce don’t quite understand what it means to suffer from the break up of a marriage like someone who has gone through divorce. Here is a challenge: Be ready to be a part of someone’s life for one year when the situation presents itself. Meet with that person – it must be a same-sex situation – for one hour a week. Grieve with her, read the Bible with her, pray with her and have meals with her. That’s it. You, too, can be all you can be by joining God’s army.

How does this apply to my life?

Today’s prayer: Lord, thank you for the gifts you have given me. Help me to spread the word about joining God’s army. Thank you for making a place for everyone. Amen

Doug Mead

Parenting Solo

Copyright 2008. All rights reserved.

Vol. 3, No. 74

This week’s reading plan can be found at http:/www.oneyearbibleonline.com/june.asp?version=51